Full circle, in the box

I've decided to scratch my 365 project. At least the way I was thinking about it. It's now 5:12 a.m. and I've been up since at least 4:30 a.m.  Since day one I have been trying to accomplish something that, right now I don't feel I can accomplish with my 365 project. I was searching for the wrong goal.  I'm trying to create something not within my grasp given my current situation.  Its time to refocus and move in a direction I completely forgot I was already going in.

The effort wont be as great to achieve what it is I'm after. I started this project a while ago and have only been sidetracked by a project that so many others have tried an accomplished. I heard or read what it was they had done and thought to myself that a 365 would be something to put under my belt and say I had done it too. 

What I have failed to realise is that I am in a very unique postion to create images that not many others have or ever will. I tend to think too far outside the box at times ending up repositioning myself safely back inside the box because I want to follow or do what others already have.  I know what my love is. Its now time to regather, refocus and push in the direction I started in and pick up where I left off. 

I now know what I can use my tumblr page for. I will be changing the name and be more dilligent with what I will be doing with it. I can't believe that I have done what I've done.  I know what I love and I suppose that waking with my mind racing at 4:30 a.m. and not being able to fall back asleep can make you realise things that I have really been overlooking.  At the end of the day a 365, to me will do me no good. Forced photos to say I met my goal for the day.  I know what I'm after and my results aren't matching up.

Old project underway. Hopefully with audio and video.  I need to really get my shit together and do this. I just can't believe I got away from what I really love and aspire to do... documentary photography. I'll leave the photos I love to look at for those who are good at it. Regardless of how good I am or am not at it, I enjoy it. My gratification for photos of that genre make up for my competence or lack thereof. Dammit, I can't believe how long it took for me to get to this point. It is now time to move on and continue what I love to do. In essence I'm living a 365 and forgot I was doing so.

Time to focus and follow through. I guess it only took waking at 4:30 a.m. and letting my mind take over to realise this.

Wake up calls

Besides wishing I had gotten one on my last day in Los Angeles to make it in time for my flight, I've gotten a few lately by way of other means.

Firstly, my 365 project has been pretty tough. Not sure if the wake up call is realizing that I have so little time to do things for myself or if this idea wasn't such a good one.  Maybe I bit off more than I can chew at this point.  I'm also struggling to find my creative juices with this project. So far, the photos I have aren't anything to brag about and they seem to just be what I can snag to say "I did it."  It would be preferred if the photos made were more cohesive and had some sort of theme or vision.  Simply, I'm struggling.

The second wake up call was about grad school.  It wasn't necessarily the way I would have liked it to happen but it happened none the less.  I have a craving to learn and this wake up call was enough to get me thinking that I should finish what I started and get my butt back to school.

Project 365

In a concerted effort to push my photography and see things "differently" and all around just take more photos for me... I'm starting a 365 photo project.  Everyday, I will take and post a new photo to my 365 project site.

What: Beginning 1-1-10 a new photo will be posted to this site everyday. It could be just about anything. It could be first thing in the morning, it might be last thing at night.  I'm expecting some absolute garbage but rest assured I will be making an effort with my photos.
Why: I currently have a photo related job but much of my time is spent in a drab cubicle staring at a glowing monitor from 9 am to 6 pm.  It isn't very conducive to making great photos.  I would like to push my creativity and I'm tired of making excuses for a lack of making great photos.

Belated Christmas

There are a few more photos from this weekend. I like this one the most.  Still prepping for my 365 project.
I haven't even started yet, since I'm starting Jan. 1, and I'm already wondering if I can pull it off.

I can... just nervous about all the hours I put it while locked away in a cubical. I'll make it work though.